merry merry

How did Christmas Eve sneak up on us? Today was filled with final preparations for Christmas. We finally got our tree up and decorated and we hung up the paper chain that Otis has dutifully been toiling over for days. F is upstairs wrapping presents and I’m putting finishing touches on Bee’s present (more on that later). I’ll admit to getting very distracted by this recipe here, which you should go and make right now, even if you are getting ready to open the biggest, most tantalizing present ever. Oh lord, it just came out of the oven, and the smell is making me unable to complete thoughts.

The other day we went to downtown San Francisco to do a little Christmas sightseeing before meeting friends for dinner in Chinatown. For reasons unknown to me, Otis decided he had to wear his Santa hat and beard. It delighted him to no end, and many passerby as well. However, while we were ogling beautiful things at Barney’s, he decided to hide in a rack of clothing, jumping out in full costume and yelling “Boo!” at one very young and very hip saleswoman, who very nearly peed in her pants. She was fortunately good natured about the whole thing, so I’m quite sure that our stern lectures to Otis afterwards will do nothing to deter him in the future. He’s now fast asleep, anxiously awaiting the arrival of Santa Claus.

Friends, I hope you’ve been having a merry holiday full of cheer. We were supposed to celebrate Christmas with my parents, but they had to return unexpectedly to Taiwan after only 10 days here. Boo hoo! It’ll be our first Christmas morning without family since we had kids, but the day will still be filled, as friends will be joining us for a big Christmas breakfast, and my cousins will join us for dinner. Much love to you all!

 

a winter escape

It’s been a little quiet here because we went away this weekend on an exciting beach getaway to Jamaica! Well, not exactly exciting, since it’s sponsored by F’s employer and he had several functions to attend, but it was a nice escape for us softies who had started to grumble about the “frigid” temperatures here in the Bay Area.

In honor of the occasion, I bought these sunglasses for Bee that I dug out of the bottom of the bargain bin at Gymboree. Glad they were a bargain, because this was about as long as she would wear them. I still get a chuckle every time I see them, though. They are covered with sparkles.

Otis, who has loved the beach in the past, complained about it relentlessly this time around: the sand was too dirty and sticky and the ocean too full of seaweed. He didn’t like having to be carried out to sea, but refused to float around on his own. He preferred to float around in the swimming pool. Unfortunately, he required a chaperone and around-the-clock entertainment while doing so.

But he was eventually coaxed back to the beach yesterday, our last day. F had no commitments, so we had a good couple of hours all together before we had to head to the airport. We let the waves wash over us, got sandy in places you don’t want to know about, and built a nice big sand dam. It was a nice day to start what ended up being an extremely long and exhausting day of travel, finally ending at home at 1am.

And I have finally discovered the secret to a good night’s sleep! It requires 5 of 6 of the largest, fluffiest Down pillows you can find, encased in nice crisp white pillowcases, piled in an inviting heap. And a turn down service with a few little chocolates doesn’t hurt either. If only Bee didn’t wake up a million times every night but the last…

It’s amazing what a bit of sun, bad TV and room service can do for your morale. I feel energized enough to face the rest of the holiday season now.

 

preparing for the holidays

The holidays have become quite huge for my extended family since I had kids. I think that being the first born grandchild has definitely had its advantages for Otis. Each year, my family asks for a list of suggestions that they can buy from, since we’re notoriously picky. The first year, I sent them a long list of carefully thought out ideas, thinking they might choose a few of their favorites, only to discover a pile the size of Mount Vesuvius by the time Christmas rolled around. The list has grown smaller year by year, and this year, as I was willing my brain to come up with a few suggestions, I made the realization that they’d finally done it, they had purchased every present there was to buy. There was nothing left! Well, nothing left for Bee, anyways, except for the super girly stuff. Ah, the price of being second-born.

As Christmas has ramped up for the kids, I find myself with less and less time for the things I used to make. Gone are the handmade Christmas cards. The homemade candy has lessened in quantity and variety. Don’t even bring up gifts. But one of the traditions I’m trying to keep up is the yearly Santa photo. No, not the picture with Santa, but the picture of the kids dressed up as Santa. I’ve done it every year since Otis was born. A little rouge on the cheeks, a Santa beard, a red hat should bring everyone some holiday cheer, right?

Here’s Otis, dressed up two years ago:

Undeniably adorable, right?

Otis and Bee, dressed up last year:

It took some work, but they were mostly cooperative and it was worth it.

But this year? This year, I thought it would be really fun to have the entire family dressed up as Santa. Can you guess what happened? PANDEMONIUM. CHAOS. NEAR-DEATH EXPERIENCES. Evidently, it’s nearly impossible to get four people to look at the camera at the same time, much less look and smile.

A loose translation of what Bee is saying here: “I said DOWN, you F****ers!”

A loose translation of what I’m saying here: “No, mister, you’re gonna take a picture NOW!”

One unhappy elf, and this was before the picture taking even started!

That elf also has one heck of a 5 o’clock shadow.

By the end of our photo session, I was feeling like this:

Criminy! When I looked at the photos later, I just shook my head in disbelief. Strangely, though, I look surprisingly cute in a number of the pictures. Too bad those pictures will never see the light of day. Otis has been rather unwilling to take pictures lately, steadfastly refusing our efforts at cajoling, joking, tricking. Anyone have any tips for us?

 

happy halloween

I feel like the world is divided up into people who really get into Halloween, and those who feel rather ambivalent about it. I definitely fall into the latter category. I don’t think I’ve really dressed up in costume since third or fourth grade. Otis, however, enthusiastically falls into the first category. Thanks to the relentless hinting of Fifth Aunt Grandma K, he’s been talking about his costume for ages. (Ahem, she’s also been talking about Christmas for the past month or so.) Luckily for me, Otis is pretty decisive. He went to see the Ringling Brothers Circus a few months ago, and well, the rest is history:

The costume was surprisingly easy to make, despite how scary and stretchy swimsuit lycra is. And, well, if you’re going to make one spandex Halloween costume, you might as well make two:

Hers was a little more challenging because I actually had to make a pattern for it myself, but it came together without too much fuss. I basically traced one of her old onesies. Here’s F, working with the kids on the show they’re going to take on the road. What a stage dad!

And I just love this picture with his friend, Mr. Incredible:

It feels so indulgent, making Otis a costume just to wear for this one day. And not just any old costume, but one that is flamboyant enough to guarantee embarrassment by the time he’s got a fuzzy upper lip and a driving permit. I’ve felt guilty and embarrassed each time people have commented on how much time it must’ve taken to make his costume because for sure, there must be more worthy ways to spend my time. But it has also been so totally worth it to see the shameless pleasure on his face. I can already see him starting to feel self-conscious here and there, and it breaks my heart to think that his innocent enjoyment will soon be replaced with something more grown up. I want to enjoy this too-short time for as long as I can. Pretty soon, he won’t want a homemade costume anymore. So for now, he will get the costume that he wants. And of course, the tenderness in my heart doesn’t stop me from putting on video tape an interview where he states quite emphatically that the idea was his and his alone.

F and I are staring at his bag of loot, wondering what our candy policy should be this year. Hope you all had a great Halloween!

 

tooling around

We are now a fully bicycled family! It started with Otis’s purple Craigslist special, continued with my supercute! bicycle, and ended with F’s recent purchase (sadly, not Craigslist. It feels like we’ve betrayed an old friend!) with our old bicycle seat attached to the back. I love the idea of the whole family biking together. F or I have been biking with Otis to school regularly, and the ride back from school is on a slight incline. F and I agreed that while it is by no means a workout, it’s just invigorating enough to wake up our stiff muscles.

I searched high and low for a bicycle helmet that would not make me feel dorky, and I ended up with this Bern helmet (I think it’s clever how they have different accessories for the different seasons). It has this funny little visor on it, which I thought would be rather useless, but actually it’s been great. While I’m biking, I’m constantly thinking, “Hey, this visor thing really works!”

See?

The whole family went out for a ride this past weekend to the Farmer’s Market. Hey Bee, how do you feel about your first bike ride?

No, really, it’ll be fun! What do you think?

Girl, don’t be a hater. Actually, she really enjoyed herself, and she showed no signs of being scared, which was just as surprising as the fact that Otis was terrified the first time he got in the child seat. Here’s the rest of the fam. Can you see a tiny bit of Otis’s sparkly fuschia streamers? Even though I have a daughter now, I’m still trying to girlify him!

I don’t have any illusions that we’ll become a true biking family. I’ll confess that we are thinking rather seriously about buying a second car, although I wish wish wish that it didn’t have to be so. But in the meantime, I’m thinking about one of these cool setups, which allows you to carry groceries and your kid at the same time, but not in a bike trailer, which appear dangerously low for a car to see. (And hey, they’re a local company!) It’s become more evident to me that I will not make going to the gym a priority anytime soon, so I’m looking for ways to make my every day life a little more active. How are you guys keeping yourselves from becoming lazy lady lumps?

 

birthday boy

We celebrated F’s birthday over the weekend. Although I’m not sure it was that much of a celebration for him, as this weekend was Otis’s school’s annual camping trip. My birthday always falls on the annual sleepover, where all the kids sleep at school and parents get a night to themselves. Let’s just say that I have the better end of this deal. But don’t worry about him, we did actually have a birthday dinner with friends, and the celebrations will continue into this week and perhaps the next.

I’ve been wanting to make F ever since I saw this post from The Purl Bee. I love their projects, especially their projects for men, but I actually really had some trouble with their pattern and ended up having to take apart one of F’s old ties and make my own pattern. So what would’ve been a Father’s Day present turned out to be a birthday present. But don’t let that deter you from trying this pattern yourself, as it appears that plenty of people have had success. I was really excited to buy some Liberty fabric, which I adore, but is so pricey that I felt like I needed just the right project to justify the purchase. I’m pretty pleased with the results, and F even had occasion to wear it on this overcast day. I just love it when my presents get used!

 

a table for bee

Remember our beloved chalkboard table that I made for Otis? Well, it’s a goner. We had to get rid of it some time ago when Ms. Bee, who might more aptly be known as The Silent Menace, became more mobile and extremely interested in anything that belonged to Otis. We had to get him a grown-up table, and we still hear shrieks of agony as her tiny, groping hands continue to clutch at the edges and manage to snag something precious. Lately, though, Bee has started to show an interest in pencils and art making herself, so it seems only fair that she have her own Bee-sized table.

Before we gave the old table away, I removed the legs that I had purchased from Ikea. I had been saving a large end of a butcher block counter from a recent kitchen renovation at a relative’s house, and it made a perfect kid-sized table. We just put the old legs on the butcher block, and now we have a nice, hefty table that can withstand a lot of abuse. I love how Ikea components can be so flexible. In recent times, Otis has been enjoying these small construction projects (he loved taking the table legs off), so I thought he would enjoy doing this with me. I drilled some holes in it, and gave the screwdriver to Otis. But one screw later, Otis lost interest and the following conversation ensued:

O: You can do the rest!

me: Oh really? I thought you wanted to help me make this table.

O: I do. But I don’t want to do this work. I’ll be the manager.

F and I exchange glances.

me: The manager? Uh, what does a manager do?

O: Oh, a manager says, “Good job!”

me: Hmm. And what does a manager say if a person doesn’t do a good job?

O: They say, “Do it again! And again! And again!”

Does this kid have potential or what? Right after we finished the table and brought it in, Bee climbed right up there and made herself at home and promptly made pencil marks all over it:

Today, I just covered it with grey chalkboard paint, so we once again have a kid-sized chalkboard table. Later on, I may reattach the magnetic strip and paper holder, and we’ll have a complete reincarnation!

 

back to school

Otis at graduation

School started this week, and all week long I’ve been thinking a lot about change. Last Friday was graduation at his school. I know that many people laugh at the concept of a preschool graduation, that we congratulate our children for insignificant “achievements” but this was not like a cap and gown ceremony at all. Since Otis’s school is a mixed age preschool, it’s a really significant rite of passage. At the same time that the graduates are saying goodbye to this place that they’ve ruled for the past year, the next oldest group of kids glimpse what’s to come in the upcoming year, with a new role in the school and the accompanying responsibilities. Two years ago, there were only two graduates that I only knew vaguely, and it mostly special because of the party afterwards. But this year, I knew these kids. I’ve spent a lot of time with them, and I felt a real sense of loss. It also made me think about this community that we’ve built at this school: not only do I know the kids intimately, but we also know the parents and the teachers, and I could call them all my friends. I hang out at the school, and I’m a part of school life. It feels like all of that will change in kindergarten. Things will happen at school that I might not hear about from the other kids or the teachers. I won’t be able to dawdle and spy. I won’t know all his classmates anymore, unless they are playmates. He will be growing up. I cried from the moment we got to school.

I’ve already noticed changes at school. The school is quieter, and the play has changed. Even his identity has changed: the other Otis graduated, so we are slowly getting used to being just “Otis” and not “Otis T,” as he has been known for the past two years. Otis, however, is excited as can be. He’s looking forward to his role as one of the big kids. With little competition, he is the first one at the swing every day. And he is taking his role as mentor and teacher very seriously, as he leads the new students around and shows them the ropes. There is much talk about “sponsibilities” very day. And he can’t wait until graduation.

 

new bike

We finally got Otis a big kid bike. He’s been speeding around on his beloved pedal-less bike, but he’s finally outgrown it. We got a second-hand bike from Craigslist (thanks, Craig!) so it comes complete with a horn and a white plastic basket with pink flowers on it. He was excited to take it for a spin, so we biked to school.

During the inaugural bike ride Otis:
- fell over but got right back on
- crashed into a parked car
- almost biked right into the street when he couldn’t remember to brake
- got tangled up in several bushes and curbside plantings
- started to get the hang of braking with the pedals instead of putting down his feet
- got really scared, but kept going
- conquered his fear temporarily while we crossed the biggest street during our ride in order to honk continuously: “honkee! honk! honkee! honk!” He also thought it necessary to honk at one car that was a block and a half away.

During the inaugural bike ride I:
- almost flipped over the stroller while trying to push it and catch a runaway bike at the same time
- felt a few more hairs turn grey
- had a few of those “heart caught in the throat” moments while I realized that Otis was one step closer to growing up

I think one thing that made that first ride especially difficult is that there is a slight decline to the route. I realized that when we rode home one day on the returning incline, and I was quite sure that snails were creeping faster than we were, especially when I was getting a steady stream of orders: “Hold me! Don’t hold me there! Push me! No, don’t push me so hard!” F and I were remembering his extreme caution when he was learning how to push around on his Like-A-Bike and it looks like he’s doing the same thing now. He wants us to hold him until he’s “ten or maybe twelve years old.” F confessed to feeling very sad when he put the bike in the basement for Bee. Looks like he had his own “heart in the throat” moment.

Since that first bike ride to school, I have purchased my very own bike too (thanks, Craig!). It’s a very cute retro-style aqua green bike. It was a very defining moment for me when F asked me: “So, what’s more important to you – safety or looking cute?” Answer: “Well… of course, safety…. but looking super cute is VERY cute.” We’ll soon be tooling around, looking very cute together, although unfortunately I don’t have a costume to wear.

 

i LOVE this girl

I am head-over-heels smitten with this girl. I just can’t get enough of her. I could spend all day: rubbing the soles of her feet; inhaling her sweet baby scent at the back of her neck; brushing her hair; watching her with Otis, the two of them starting to invent their inside jokes; obediently feeding her bits of fruit as she signs more! more! I am her willing slave, just to catch a glimpse of her face, lighting up with happiness. I never thought I would know the joy of having a cuddly baby, full of kisses and hugs and the want and need to be held close and tight, and I tell you it is heaven.

As an aside, we had been having such issues with Otis, who at some recent point decided that there was no greater joy in life than torturing his sister. Never did an opportunity go unseized where an innocent foot could trip up a baby or a long-forgotten baby toy suddenly beg to be played with. I was pulling my hair out trying to get him to treat her with the same consideration that he treats his friends at school. I empathized with him, of course, but it was getting to the point where I couldn’t leave a room for 3 minutes without someone complaining loudly of the other’s crimes. One day, though, I asked him if he needed to be shown how to play well with Bee, just like the way his cousin Dede had done, paying attention to her cues to see what she was interested in, and trying to figure out what her limits were. He declined my offer, but it seems that he started to think about it because I noticed a few days ago that things were suddenly more harmonious. After this went on for a couple of days, he told me that he was trying to play well now, like Cousin Dede did. I’ve been really proud of his efforts, and Bee has been lapping up his attentions. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that things will just go uphill from here. Now I’m just going to have to make sure that Bee doesn’t take advantage of him!